Honoring our Dads

By Rachel Sircy 

This past weekend was Father’s Day, my sister’s wedding, and my nephew’s birthday party. Sound busy? You have no idea.

I want to dedicate this blog post to the man who made all three of these things possible at once, that is my stepfather, Bob Wachenschwanz. He’s a man with a big last name and a bigger heart. Not only was my sister’s wedding this weekend, but my parent’s backyard was the site for the reception. A party tent had to be erected, tables and chairs set up, decorations set out and then all of it had to be cleaned up that same day. Bob – with help from my sweet husband (also a wonderful Dad whom I would like to honor), my brother, new brother-in-law and the groomsmen – did all of this, and still managed to walk my sister down the aisle, take my nieces and nephews on a wagon ride, and host a dinosaur-themed birthday party. At one point before the wedding, a strong wind knocked over the party-tent and badly damaged one of the poles. The groomsmen gave the tent up for lost, but then Bob showed up with his multi-tool in hand and straightened out the pole by himself. One of the guys said that he must be Macgyver, which is actually what my sisters and I used to call him when he and my mother were first married. We also referred to him as Bob the Builder – after the children’s TV show character, because the theme song to that show goes, like this, “Can he fix it? Yes, he can!”

I am sharing this story because this weekend I was reminded what a treasure I have in my stepfather. I wanted to thank him and let him know how much I love and appreciatefather and kids him. Men who put in the time and effort to love and care for their children are hard to come by and I don’t want to take Bob for granted.

I want to encourage all of you readers out there to take some time this week, or this month, to think about and show your appreciation for the wonderful Dad in your life – whether he is living or is gone, if he’s your stepfather, uncle or just a dad you happen to know. Let him know that you see his hard word and you are thankful for him!

Unfortunately

By: Chaunte McClure

Last Sunday was Father’s Day, and while some daughters were planning get-togethers, deciding what to buy Dad, or where to take him, there were also daughters (and sons) who were dreading the day’s arrival. Why? Because their father is absent, unavailable or unattached and they knew that day, like every day, would be a fatherless day.

According to the National Fatherhood Initiative, 24 million children live without their biological father in the home. While some of them may have a relationship with their biological father, most of them don’t and the effects are alarming.

A few weeks ago I participated in a workshop for fatherless girls, where I shared my story of being a fatherless daughter. Through tears, I saw pain and through the words, I heard the pain loud and clear, coming from girls, mostly teens, who lack a relationship with their dads. When the facilitator asked one participant if her father is still living, her response: “Unfortunately.”

Unfortunately, too many children share this heart-rending sentiment. As a matter of fact, many adults do too.

It’s girls and women like these that I long to reach out to help. I was that angry little girl once and for years, she lived in me as an adult. Fortunately, in my twenties, I recognized her character and decided I didn’t want that angry little girl having a negative impact on my life, and as result, the life of others any longer. It is a journey, but a journey worth taking when that means having a more peaceful, purposeful life and bringing others along to join you on the journey to love, acceptance and forgiveness.

Though it does not fill the void, I usually honor someone on Father’s Day whether it’s a family member or someone I know and respect.

If you are a fatherless daughter, how do you respond to Father’s Day?

P.S. I’ve used the term fatherless daughter here, but I do understand that everyone has a biological father, but not everyone has the privilege to know their father or emotionally connect with him.

I’m A Mutt

By: Stacy Thompson

People like to say that a person takes on the physical or emotional embodiment of his/her dog—if that were true, at one time or another I would have been described as a stout, menacing, but sweetheart of a Rottweiler (OK, so not far off); a placid, neurotic, scared-of-everything Lab-mix (way far off); and a Cheeto-lovin’ doe-eyed, gotta-follow-you-everywhere-you-go gangly Rottie-Lab mix (yeah, well, I’m OK if you want to go into a room unattended, but I do love some Cheetos). I’ve been the happy Mom to both pure-bred pups and mixes; and although we share the same penchant for unconditional love, I can say with assurance that it ends there—but with both Mother’s Day and Father’s Day in my rear view mirror, I am proud to say that I am a mutt in the best sense of the word.

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From Mom I have gained the desire to make a list and check things off, while going off-list and doing (climbing, jumping, running, hiking, venturing) beyond that which is expected. She taught me to plan ahead but to never be afraid of the unplanned, as that is where life is lived and loved. She taught me that even if you follow a guide you can pave your own path and attain more than what even you think is possible. This was a woman who upon receiving her Medicare card decided to climb Mt. Kilimanjaro—pretty big accomplishment, for sure, but only one adventure in her many roads and paths (stay tuned, she’s not done yet!). And most importantly, she showed me that everything is possible; and in case it’s not attained, she will always have my back!

From Dad, after my teen-year eye-rolls were done, I learned what compassion, patience and hard work can bring—not just financial security but a soulful peace and satisfaction of a job not just well-done but a job done well, for others. I learned from him that laughing at yourself can be the funniest and most stress-relieving act ever, while laughing with someone can bring the greatest joy. I inherited his corny sense of humor, terrible knees, gonna-burn-before-you-tan skin and his need/drive to help whoever and  wherever possible—not just to accomplish a task, but to create a vocation, a calling, that makes each day worth it.  And finally, I know for sure, to paraphrase his own words, “I may not know where I’m going, but I’m making good time.”

So this mutt wants to spend this post thanking the two most important people in my life—they make it fun and fabulous not only to work hard but to play hard, while enjoying each equally. Every day is a treat when they simply walk into a room, and, much like my pups, I get excited every time!

Happy Mother’s Day and Happy Father’s Day from your Mutt! Love you both!