Redefined, And I’m Good with It

By: Sherree Thompson

Mother's Day

As Mother’s Day was approaching, I was asked several people what I wanted for my special day. I thought quite hard on the matter. What did I want? Hmm.  Well, a number of normal things ran through my head…maybe a piece of jewelry, or a massage, or just a simple morning of sleeping in. All of that sounded just grand to me, yet that’s not really what I wanted. Actually, I didn’t want anything – nothing material, anyway.

What would really make me happy is to see the sweetness in my daughter’s heart. To share her voluntarily share her treat with her brother. To see my son studying how crickets hop and how his mind processes that action. To see my husband with our babies, helping to heal an imaginary “boo-boo.” These are the things that fill my heart with such joy. These are the things that make all the sleep deprivation, deliriousness and the redefining of me worth it.

I think for me the hardest one of those hurdles was the “redefining of me.” I was driving Jesse to school the other morning when I looked into the car next to me. The lady was so well put together, hair done, clothes on straight and her car so soooo clean. That’s when I thought, “That used to be me.” For a minute I started down the road of “Wow, I’ve really let myself go,” but then I caught a glimpse of my sweet babies in the rearview mirror. That sweet glimpse made me realize that it’s not about what I used to be, who I was or what job I held. I was no longer defined by those bullet points. I have been chosen to be the mother of these very special beings in the backseat. There are no earning manuals or guidelines written in black ink for this job.

Without those guidelines, I have compared myself to others. I have looked at other mothers and their journeys for guidance. I have fallen short of what I thought was normal so many times. I thought the house had to be picture perfect, kids dressed to impress all day every day, as well as a number of other things. Here is the kicker: When I do that, I have found I’m trying to keep up. Keep up instead of living the way God wants me to.

Yes, my car is a mess with drip marks from random juice boxes. Yes, I am late to almost every appointment. Yes, I do envy those who get to shower daily. It’s easy to get sucked into the cycle of wanting to be who I was and have the things I had. But it is also very, very easy for me to look at what I have been given in place of those things.  I would never change the magical gift that has been given to me by God.

Being defined as my children’s mother is one of the best compliments anyone can give me. I hope you spent this Mother’s Day thinking remembering the person you used to be and loving the person you have become, a mother.

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